When have accepted our loss, however minor or significant.
From “Codependent No More”
We are comfortable with it and our lives. We have adjusted and reorganized. Once more, we are comfortable with our present circumstances and ourselves.
Not only are we comfortable with our circumstances and the changes we have endured, but we believe we have in some way benefitted from our loss or change even if we cannot fully understand how or why.
We have faith that is all is well, and we have grown from our experience. We deeply believe our present circumstance — every detail of them — are exactly as they ought to be for the present moment. In spite of our fears, feelings, struggles, and confusion, we understand everything is okay even if we lack insight.
One thing that helps me is thanking God for the loss — for my present circumstances — regardless of how I feel or what I think about them. Another thing that helps many people is the Serenity Prayer.
Learn the art of acceptance.”
It’s a lot of grief … and anger, denial, bargaining, depression, etc, and sometimes it’s moving back and forth through these stages — throughout months, or years, or even a life time, or days. We don’t have to behave inappropriately, but we need to go through it.